The Ultimate Die Hard's Online Dating Profile


My Self Summary:

Hey, my name is Adam. I like to ride snowmobiles. Looking for a “seasonal” relationship as I am already fully committed to one in the winter. If you are looking for a guy who will ignore you half the year, are interested in having your iMessage’s “Sent as Text” because they are on a mountain top and someone who will leave at a moments notice to chase pow I am your guy. Must be willing to listen to endless sledding stories about me being awesome, how deep the pow was (tits deep) and plans for my next trip. Ideal match would be excellent at wrenching in the garage, detail oriented for helping me with my killer wrap install and adept at bringing me beer. Come summer I am all yours - but winter it’s all braaap.

What I’m Doing with My Life:

Sledding.

I’m Really Good At:

Holding a long sidehill. Dangling through the trees — man, I pull the sickest lines!

The First Things People Usually Notice About Me:

Not sure if it’s the NW Sledder hat, shirt and lanyard. Maybe it’s the sled that never leaves my deck. Could be the 17 weather apps on my phone (gotta find that pow). Or the decal on my truck with my instagram handle @I_live_for_sledding… but somehow people always seem to know I am a snowmobiler.

The Six Things I Could Never Do Without:

  • My brand new sled (that is already mostly destroyed)

  • Fresh gear (that is still not dry from my last ride)

  • My truck (it’s worth half what my sled cost, definitely needs an oil change but that’s just #sledlife)

  • Snacks — I need all the energy I can get to continue being awesome.

  • Friends — apparently not everyone wants to ride 100+ days a year…

  • My brand new sled. Did I mention my sled?

I Spend A Lot of Time Thinking About:

Sledding.

The Most Private Thing I’m Willing To Admit:

Sometimes I do get stuck.

I’m Looking For:

Blower pow, 5 more pounds of boost and a natural hit that will definitely show my buddies up.

…Wait… is this the part where I am supposed to write what I am looking for in a person? Right. Yeah… maybe she could have 3 inch lugs and a long track (size does matter), a beauty set of headlights and the ability to ride for days.

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